Things That Drive Me Nuts

You know what drives me nuts? When I go to a public restroom and someone in a neighboring stall starts peeing so hard and so fast that it makes them fart. That drives me crazy. 

Seriously, when did peeing become such a huge race? You're not pushing a baby out.  You're peeing!  Just sit (or squat) over the toilet and relax. It's going to come out all by itself.  I promise.  You don't have to push as if you're in labor. Everyone knows what is going to happen if your squeeze with all of your might.  

So, get a clue (because it's grossing the rest of us out). You're not getting any points for finishing 2 seconds before me. Plus, you'll probably get a disgusted look from me at the hand washing station because I think you are a cochina.

Word of the day: Cochina
Urban dictionary's definition of cochina: A Dirty Girl